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The Year in Review

It’s that time of year again. Check out my previous annual round-ups for 2010 and 2011.

I’d like to take this opportunity once more to thank all my readers and wish you guys a happy new year!

Due to commitments with college and publishing my first book, 2012 wasn’t quite what last year was in terms of travelling… but that’s not to say it didn’t feature the odd warzone or breakaway republic.  Today, we look back at the roller-coaster that was 2012 and give you guys a preview for a mental 2013.

2012 in review

January – Feb

The Indiana Jones Trail, Petra

My Arabic Prize

The year started with a blast as me and my crew stormed the Arab world in the Siege of the Levant, visiting Lebanon, Syria,  Jordan, Palestine and Israel. Highlights included getting caught up in demonstrations in war-torn Syria (after arriving at the border with a giant inflatable banana), nearly riding my horse off a cliff in a mountain top race in Petra, and shagging a famous Lebanese pop singer who performed a private belly dance for me. (You’ll have to wait for my next book for that story) Argh!!!

I write city guides on Beirut, Damascus, Amman, and Jerusalem.

After numerous requests, I also announce the opening of the Naughty Nomad Forum, which today has a healthy 800+ members. Join up! Join up!

The Spring

I take a little weekend break and return to Amsterdam to give it a second chance, get high and blow of some steam with the family clan.

I also sleigh my Leviathan and capture the Chinese flag.

At the start of April, me and four crewmembers go a debauched five day siege in Oslo and the Baltics. I take down a viking, a Frenchie and capture my Latvian flag. Read about the fun here.

I also dish the dirt with 10 Great tips for texting girls, which becomes one of my most popular articles of all time.

At home, I start work as a professional musician and become the lead singer of a rock band, acting out my fantasy of being a rock star (albeit only in a pub band).


Book Cover

My new job makes meeting women almost too easy. I take my game up a notch,  give up porn, and start dating like crazy. In a month I gather a diverse quartet, bedding a Northern Irish lingerie model, a virgin, a 18 y0 schoolgirl and a Mexican (new flag).

I finish my exams for my Masters for International Relations and celebrate my last day of school in true Naughty Nomad style, before jetting off to Malta for a few days r & r. I return home and build up my harem, auditioning a second Mexican and a fiery Nigerian.

On August 1st, I publish Naughty Nomad: Not your typical backpacker story. Sales skyrocket on the release date, pushing my first book to No.1 for new releases in travel writing. The book is well received by critics and readers. What a great day!

September – November

Mark Zolo

Caucas luv

After one of the most stressful periods of my life (writing my thesis), I jet off to Sweden and the Caucasus, visiting Georgia, Azerbaijan, Armenia and the breakaway republics of Abkhazia and Ngoro-Karbakh (I’ve recently written guides on Tbilisi and Baku if you want to check them out). Highlights include capturing my 50th flag in Stockholm, making a pirate music video with four friends in Abkhazia, getting caught up in a police riot in Baku and illegally entering the bombed city of Agdam in Armenian occupied  Karabakh. Somehow through a stroke of luck, I also picked up the Georgian and Azeri flags in the process. It wasn’t much of region for nightlife, but I was really surprised at how beautiful it was. Recommended.

Sukumi Parliament, Abkhazia

Nov – December

My life is porn-free for over five months. Sex has become exciting once more. I add two Asian teenagers to my harem, a Filopina virgin (past tense) and Japanese girl via my favourite college society. I settle down for Christmas, continue gigging and save for my next adventure.

The blog hits 3,000,000 pageviews and 5000+ subscribers. Book sales continue to exceed my expectations.

2012 Stats:

Total Countries visited: 16 

New Countries visited: 10 + 2 unofficial

New Flags Captured: 7 

That puts my ultimate goal for travelling to every country in the world at 82/196 or 42%. Not too shabby. A little tamer than other years, but don’t worry, 2013 is already shaping up to be one of the most exciting years yet…

2013 Preview

Feb/March  – I’ve already booked my ticket to Dubai to visit a friend in Muscat, Oman. From there it’s off back to Ethiopia for a hardcore (albeit rather short) Siege in the horn of Africa.

Autumn – I will embark on one the world’s last great adventures: The Silk Road… with a twist.

Bring it on!

8 Responses to The Year in Review

  1. Rick91 December 29, 2012 at 8:04 pm #

    Damn your life is an inspiration. Hope you got a second book on the way you legitimate legend.

  2. Rafael Säkkijärvelainen December 29, 2012 at 8:31 pm #

    Great post, as always.

    I don’t mean to be an annoying motherfucker, just a contributor, but you wrote ” 2012 preview” in the end, you might want to correct that.

  3. Anonymous December 30, 2012 at 1:47 am #

    The Silk Road? Is Naughty Nomad going to begin selling products for Bitcoins? Awesome!

  4. sirmarjalot December 30, 2012 at 7:16 am #

    Hey, would be interesting to learn how you go about writing your own book and getting it published, whats involved? Is it something you can do independently or need to have connections? Also is it lucrative for you, will it fund your travelling or just good to see your name in lights, hobby kind of thing?

  5. shamrock December 30, 2012 at 12:55 pm #

    whoa you got with a pop star!!whats her name?you got to be kidding me
    bang an american celebrity ,thatll get you real famous
    how old were the asian teenagers?

  6. Fujiwara December 30, 2012 at 9:16 pm #

    Mark, very glad to see that throughout the year, you’ve been able to rack up many stamps on your passport, and many flags on your belt.

    While I’m not the traveler you are, come midway through 2013 I’ve got quite the list of different countries that I will be in. I’m sure that if I can get into half the mischief that you’ve gotten yourself into in ’12, I’ll be a whole new man by the end of it.

    Best wishes for 2013, and I’ll catch you on the RVF.

  7. Nick January 15, 2013 at 8:33 pm #

    Hey NM, Been reading the blog for a few years now. Love it and recommend it to all my buddies. Can’t wait to buy the book, too. Hopefully one day a movie will follow 🙂

    So I gotta ask you something serious. How did you give up porn? The longest I’ve gone in this time of high speed internet is maybe a week or two, and thats rarely by choice but because I’m crashing on a friends couch or something.

    Any tips you’ve got for getting rid of it would be appreciated.

    Thanks buddy, and keep on with the stories!


  1. The Year in Review 2013 | Naughty Nomad - January 2, 2014

    […] Another year has past. It’s hard to believe, but this is the 4th year -in-review. Check out my previous adventures for 2010, 2011, and 2012. […]

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