Top Bar

[an error occurred while processing this directive]
[an error occurred while processing this directive]

50 flags (Edit:60+ Flags)

[EDIT, Dec 2013: I’m at 64 flags now]

On Friday night, I got my Swedish flag. It was a worthy epitaph to my misadventures in flagging.  I’m generally a casual flagger, but after finishing my dissertation in early September I was a man on a mission. I wanted to get my 50th flag before my 26th birthday. It was a kind of a lame goal, but screw it. What else was I going to do before this holiday came around?

In that time, I learned a lesson. Flagging for the sake of flagging is a folly. There is no point in dicking some ugly mongoloid just to get a flag. (A caveat to this is difficult countries, like Saudi, Bhutan, or North Korea. If someone banged a 500lb dreg-wench from either country I think I’d still be impressed).

Could I have gotten my 50th flag before my birthday?

Yes. I had a Somalian-Dutch girl, a Korean, and a Russian all on a plate, but nada.

I met the Somalian at a bar. She was cute, but I pushed too hard and blew it (she was a Muslim and I went way too caveman way too soon). The other two girls I met online. They looked good on their online profiles, but in real life they were well below my pay grade. The Korean has a serious case of snaggletooth. I feared kissing her would lead to bloodbath as she gum-fucked me with her mighty tusks. And the Russian: she was the most boring, non-sexual robot I’ve met in my life. Her photo cunningly disguised the fact that she was carrying a few extra pounds, too. After my second drink, I couldn’t stand to be another second in her company, so I bolted.

‘No way,’ I told myself. ‘I’m going to remember my 50th flag, so she’s got to be hot.’

As such, the only ‘strange’ I experienced during September was a Mexican chick I picked up outside a bar one night. Unfortunately, she was painfully bad in the sack.

Fast forward to Thursday when I’ve arrived here in Stockholm, Sweden: a poosy paradise brimming with loose Viking wenches dying for some pirate loving.

On our pillaging spree Friday, my catch of the day was a young, slim, sexy, mixed race Swedish-Caribbean girl. It was worth the wait. I gave up porn several months ago and I purposely became celibate a 4 days before the trip to maximize my testosterone levels for the weekend. And let me tell you, sinking my sword into that beautiful nubile was so utterly glorious, I got high off it. I pumped a wicked helping of my love juice deep inside her, my boys invading their 50th country in style.

So, what now?

Is 50 flags enough? When will I be content? I don’t really mind so much any more. 50 is enough for any man. The truth is flagging had a dichotomous effect on my sex life.

The are a few negatives. When you start to pass up 8s and 9s for 6s and 7s just because of a new flag, you know something is askew. As soon as a girl tells me she’s from a country where I have already captured the flag, my interest plummets. What’s with that? Sex starts to feel more like a sport. A new flag is like a competitive match, while the rest are like boring friendlies to fill the time. Another notch…big deal. Who cares?

But the positives far out weight the negatives. When you travel to a new country, hooking up with local often leads to richer cultural experience. You get to know a country in a way that no package tour can ever offer. But the main positive is this: I’m living a fun life. Having sex with foreign women is what a men are put on this earth to do. Flagging is the manifestation of genetic diversification in all it’s glory. And you know what? It’s feels bloody good.

Genghis Khan and Alexander the Great had to build vast empires and fight many wars in order to pillage vaginas as man’s farthest frontier. For the modern man, all he needs is a plane ticket and a little game.

Anyway, it’s back to business for me. I posted when I got 40 flags in June last year, so here is a recap of the ten latest newbies to make the list.

Slán leat amigos.

 The latest 10

Sweden

Mexico

Lativa

China

Lebanon

Mongolia

Panama


Cyprus

Iran

Greece

 

The rest in alphabetical order…

Angola

Australia

Brazil

Cambodia

Cameroon

Canada

Cote d’Ivoire

Denmark

Dominican Republic

East Timor

Estonia

Ethiopia

France

The Gambia


Germany

Ghana

Guinea

Haiti

Indonesia

Ireland

Isreal

Japan

Liberia

Macedonia

Malaysia

Mali

Malta

Moldova

Nigeria

Norway

The Philippines

Portugal

Sierra Leone

Spain

Thailand

Uganda

Ukraine

United Kingdom

United States


Zambia

18 Responses to 50 flags (Edit:60+ Flags)

  1. JJ October 8, 2012 at 7:11 pm #

    Nice!

  2. Thomas October 9, 2012 at 1:41 am #

    Congrats man, 50 before 26 is epic. You should do a post on quitting porn.

  3. Deb Auchery October 9, 2012 at 9:29 pm #

    I was getting 50 flags confused with 50 shags ;). Either is good for a chap your age 🙂

  4. Wonky October 10, 2012 at 10:39 am #

    You slut!

  5. daym October 27, 2012 at 7:05 pm #

    how did you get a lebanese and persian flag?
    im assuming no way you went those counrtys
    the lebanese mustve been christian an the persian mustve been atheist
    noticed that iif you are lucky enough to find an easy middle eastern girl shes either israeli , lebanses, or persian

  6. daym October 27, 2012 at 9:01 pm #

    surprised you didnt get your south afriaca flag yet…

  7. cockmaster October 30, 2012 at 5:59 am #

    the canada and usa flag…were they native girls?

    • Naughty Nomad October 30, 2012 at 12:57 pm #

      Of course.

  8. cockmaster November 12, 2012 at 6:25 pm #

    ohhh sombody hit up the reservations
    how bout the aussie girl was she aborignie?

  9. cockmaster November 12, 2012 at 6:27 pm #

    should hit up new zealand an catch a maori flag
    congo south africa honduras north korea an the vatican flag would be pretty cool too

  10. fogal November 21, 2012 at 3:26 pm #

    returnof kings mentions how to catch the argentina flag..may wanna look into it
    would greenland be an up comin choice yet

  11. gary June 23, 2014 at 7:18 am #

    you don’t have an Italian flag? that is probably one of the most memorable flags any dick swinger can get.

  12. Ryan July 10, 2014 at 12:48 pm #

    What flags have you got since fifty?

  13. bhaight December 11, 2014 at 2:36 pm #

    What do you guys think about whether a girl is not natively from the country. Which flag do you get? I hooked up with a girls who to me is swiss but her parents and family are from Bosnia and she calls herself Bosnian. What flag did I get?

    Or some Chinese dude says he got his Brazilian flag but the girls roots are 100% Japanese?

  14. askme June 24, 2015 at 12:01 am #

    Did you capture an Indian flag ever? Women here are the dumbest.

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. LIGFY – Oct 14 | Society of Amateur Gentlemen - October 14, 2012

    […] Naughty Nomad – 50 Flags […]

  2. The Year in Review | Naughty Nomad - December 31, 2012

    […] written guides on Tbilisi and Baku if you want to check them out). Highlights include capturing my 50th flag in Stockholm, making a pirate music video with four friends in Abkhazia, getting caught up in a […]

  3. Finding THE Girl: A Never-Ending Global Search of Pain & Progress - The Gonzo Traveller - June 7, 2013

    […] with women outside of Europe (I have, as much as it conflicts me to use the term, only three “flags” under my belt), it’s also bred a lot of confusion over whether I’ve made a killer […]

Leave a Reply

[an error occurred while processing this directive] [an error occurred while processing this directive]