Avast me harties!

Looking for a real adventure!?

Get ready for Naughty Nomad’s GREAT LIBERIAN TREASURE HUNT!

As a Mexican Pirate I naturally bury treasure. Now you, my readers, have a chance to find such treasure!

I’ve left a series of clues around the capitol hill district in the city of Monrovia, Liberia, West Africa. Hopefully they’re still there, but I made sure its extremely difficult to remove them and find them without the clues.

This will hopefully be the first of many Mexican Pirate Treasure Hunts.

The treasure is €100 (not much, but that’s a year’s income if you’re Liberian). You will also receive the prestigious award: ‘The Golden Scroll“. The last clue reveals the secret password. Send it to me via email : thenaughtynomad@gmail.com.

if you survive…

Why Liberia?

Because the Golden Scroll isn’t worthy of pussies.

So now I can finally reveal the first clue…

“Try your luck with an ocean view,

A tree snake points you to the clue,

Go to do a number two,

It’s written on the walls for you…”

GOOD LUCK!

BTW:

This is a very dangerous mission. Those who choose to accept should know the risks involved.

If you make to the effort to go to Monrovia email me anyway. I’m sure I could give you a few hints if you’re struggling or run into difficulties.

Having traveled this route through West Africa, I am lucky enough to have visited all eleven countries on the coast from Dakar to Lagos.

Using my Top 10 destinations in South East Asia as a template, I will using the following criteria.

These places/countries are judged on:

•   - Natural beauty / Historical wonders
• – Unique Experiences offered
•  - The Chill-out Factor (Off the beaten track, smoke etc.)
• – The Craic! (Irish term meaning fun or entertainment)
•  - The Girls  (the real X factor)

 

So here they are…

Naughty Nomad’s

TOP 10 Spots in West Africa!

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10. Cap Skirring, Senegal

In a word: Moo.

  I’ts got an alright beach with lazy cows.

 Meeting random cows on the road and the Beach. Enjoying fresh fish by the sea where you effectively rent the whole restaurant. The atmosphere is enhanced when the owners come out with the Djembe drums.

Many hotels have pools and you’re not far from the beach. Smoke is easily available, albeit overpriced considering the area is touristy by WA standards.

Night time options are limited but the two or three venues open late are really good fun.

 A decent gaggle of friendly girls around at night. Most speak French.

Bottom Line: The best that Senegal has to offer, but that’s ain’t saying much.

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9. Senegambia, The Gambia

In a word: Simple.

  I’ts got a pretty good beach and a laid back village feel.

 Checking out all the old grannies getting stuck in the young local guys… Hilarious.

Hammocks, beach, weed everywhere – not a bad spot for chilling.

Good Restaurants and wild nightlife (but only one or two options). Check out my Gambian Coast guide for info.

 Party most nights with a good few girls about at night. They come from all over the region and nearly all speak English.

Bottom Line: Better than Senegal, but local guys can be pretty bothersome.

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8. Labadi Beach, Ghana

In a word: Slick.

  Beach and babes, that’s enough.

 Smoke Sheesha and check out a beach concert.

There’s lots of people around but your still by the beach drinking, it’s hard not to relax.

Plenty of people having fun partying. After sundown it sedates but during this is probably the best spot for partying during the day in WA.

 Loads of sexy chicks from all parts of the world strutting around in bikinis. This is the best place in Ghana to pick up.

Bottom Line: Wicked hang-out. I’d score it higher if wasn’t surrounded by crappy Accra.

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7. Lake Aheme, Benin

In a word: Juju.

  Quiet lake with beautiful sandy shores.

 The eco-tours there are excellent. You will learn traditional fishing methods and you learn all about voodoo. If you’re really lucky (as we were), you get to witness a voodoo sacrafice.

A 5 star set up with no tourists. Smoke available. Grab a beer lakeside and enjoy. The lake is the perfect getaway from the capital Cotonou.

Not much going on, but at weekend’s there is a local disco.

 A lot women walk around topless, but are conservative in every other respect. Wasn’t there on the weekend but I’d imagine you’d try to be sold someone’s cousin. Not a place to pick up chicks.

Bottom Line: For me, West Africa’s ultimate chill out spot.

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6. Togo (in general)

In a word: Pleasent.

  Between Lome’s pristine sands and butterfly walks in Kpalimé’s beautiful forests, Togo ranks high for natural beauty.

 Learn about coffee & coca plantations on a guided tour exploring the area around beautiful Kpalimé. The guides are great too.

Lomé is West Africa’s most chilled capital. Kpalimé got some nice waterfalls if you willing to trek to see them.

Lome has a laid back vibe but it hosts West’s Africa’s biggest nightclub! Check out the Lomé city guide to get a better feel for the nightlife.

 A few nationalities about. Not the easiest place to pick up but still very doable. VIP Privé club has some fine women.

Bottom Line: A breath of fresh air on the road from Accra to Lagos.

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5. Monrovia, Liberia

In a word: Threesome?

  Not great as beach isn’t up to much and apparently quite dangerous.

 Having girls call to your door late at night for threesomes. Before they rob you that is…

City isn’t so hectic. Roof toop bars are the best places for unwinding.

Liberia by night is truly an adventure. Check out my Monrovia City Guide for more info.

 Girls in Liberia love to f**k. I never had to refuse so much sex in my life as I did here. The only problem is knowing who to trust. But dam, Liberian girls are a little addictive. Hence the high ranking.

Bottom Line: West Africa’s most off the beaten track country is well worth it.
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4. Lagos, Nigeria

In a word: Chaos.

  Nada. Although Victoria Island has some nice parts.

 Some the world’s worst traffic and daily dealings with bribery and corruption.

There’s weed around, but not much places to chill.

The craic in Lagos in unrivaled. The place is exhilarating. Probably the wildest nightlife in West Africa. Plenty of options with cheap beer and live music.

 Arguably the best looking (and friendliest) girls in Africa. You’ll understand if you read my Lagos City Guide.

Bottom Line: You haven’t been to Africa if you haven’t been to Lagos.

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3. Cote d’Ivoire (in general)

In a word: Magnifique!

  Great jungles near Liberia and lagoon views in the streets of Abidjan.

 Having the world’s biggest church all to yourself (I’m not religious but wow!). Enjoying the Marquai bars.

The capital is really laid back and it’s not hard to get your hand on weed from the Marquai bars.

Nightlife in Abidjan is mega. Biking from the Liberian border is also an epic jungle trail.

 The sexiest girls I’ve experienced in Francophone West Africa. Often friendly and well educated too.

Bottom Line: For many who visit the region, this is their favorite country in West Africa.

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2. Guinea (in general)

In a word: Unexpected.

  With many of the region main rivers originating in the Fouta Djallon, this place is filled with mountains and waterfalls. For me, the most beautiful country in the region. Beaches in the capital.

 The Journey from hell. Ultimate jungle treks. Having to put on hoody because the chill in the mountain air (a welcome temperature change).

Taking a swim over a waterfall. Weed is abundant. Very chilled. Even in the capital you can find quiet moments by the beach.

Conakry has a pretty decent nightlife and displays great variety. The beach parties are a blast too.

 The Fula girls are gorgeous. English isn’t that prevalent but with a little French you can bag yourself a hottie.

Bottom Line: Reminded me of Ethiopia… my favourite country in West Africa.

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1. Freetown Peninsula, Sierra Leone

In a word: Heaven?

  Jungle mountains by the sea. Fantastic beaches.

 Being able to smoke joints in nightclubs.

Beach bars with hookahs? Aberdeen is the ultimate chill out spot. Everyone smokes and it’s not problem in some restaurants even. You can even buy joints in clubs.

Wild nights, every night. Options are limited, but the venues are Grade A. Beers are cheap too. Freetownians really know how to have a good time. Check out my Freetown city guide for more info.

 It’s very easy to pick up in Freetown 5/5. Only Monrovia is easier. You can find some real gems here as well. There’s also Lebanese and other expats for the taking.

Bottom Line: Beautiful scenery,  loose women, weed and cheap beer in clubs = awesome. Easily the best location in West Africa!

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Honourable Mentions

I decided to only include places I’ve actually been in the top 10. As such, the list above only covers countries on the coast from Dakar to Lagos. I contacted some fellow globe-trotters to give their top 10 on the route as well. Here are some other picks from fellow travellers…

• Robertsport, Liberia
• Goree Island, Senegal (I’ve been here. Good escape from Dakar but very small.)
• Ganvie, Benin
• Kokobrite, Ghana (Been here. It could have made the list if I had went on the weekend)
• Sine-Saloum Delta, Senegal
• Bissagos Islands, Guinea Bissau (nice place, but get out of Bubaque and explore further)

Check out my my West African City Guides!

Please share your favourite places! Leave a comment below!

 

Monrovia in a word: unfrequented.

Chance of Hooking up: 5 / 5
Quality of Girls: 2.5 / 5
Nightlife: 3 / 5
Smoking tolerance level: 3 / 5

City guide ratings explained

Costs €$£

Beer: $3 for a small beer in clubs.
Bed: $100 for a private room. ($35 for a shitty brothel on front street, not recommended)
Bud: $? Can’t be much
Board: $7  for a standard meal.
Budget other: You need moto taxis to explore the nightlife. Club entry is around $15, free before mid night.

Currency Conversion

Overview

Liberia has a GDP per capita lower than Somalia but still manages to be one the most expensive cities in West Africa to visit. It’s also considered  quite dangerous and things like running water and electricity are almost non-existant. Recently a war zone, this place is seriously off the beaten track. Many of the building are now bullet ridden shells. As such, tourists in Monrovia are unheard of.  But hey – it’s good fun! Unlike most African cities, it is well laid out and thus not so hectic. Liberians can prove quite hospitable and the women may be the most accommodating on the planet!

The Girls

If you haven’t already, I’d strongly recommend  you read my article Sex in Africa 101 before continuing.

Liberian girls are not like any other African. The have extra attitude, spunk and they love to fuck (they also have cute semi-American accents and are known for their big booties). I’d give them a higher rating but unfortunately, the best looking Liberian girls are usually found outside the country in Sierra Leone, Ghana and other countries where they can earn better money as prostitutes: a sad fact of war.

Monrovia might just be the easiest place in the world to get laid. Threesomes are common and if you ask a girl to bring her friend along she will. Sounds like a dream right? If you’re a foreigner, local girls are likely to pounce on you in nightclubs, but equally likely to carry a knife. Do not bring girls back to your place. This is the 5th poorest country in the world and you’d be surprised what people are willing to do to get their hands on a little cash. Get a rent by the hour room on front street if you must or if they have a place go back to theirs. Be wary of the “pay $10 for my transport” scam. Precautions aside you can have a blast here. Just read my experience below. If you want to get a local girl it’s simple: go on the weekend, read my last nightlife recommendation below and then just show up. That’s it.

If you’re looking for something a little less dangerous, there are two other types you can for. First there is the ‘Congos’, the rich decedents from freed American Slaves (indecently they enslaved the locals when they first arrived); they mainly hang out in the classier little bars near the U.S embassy in central Monrovia, but mainly in the diplomatic area of Sinkor. Finally there is expats and the staff at the casino at Ocean view hotel (near Mamba point). Here you can find some semi-decent Eastern Europeans (mostly Romanian) and the odd Asian.

Nightlife Recommendations

Outside the weekends and Wednesdays (ladies night) don’t expect much. Sunday the Casino is the only place open, but other nights you can find some sort of fun.

Exodus

This is the place where all the expats and NGOs will warn you about. “It’s dangerous” we were told. Therefore we had to check it out. It’s a decent sized bar with strictly locals. The good news is it’s in the city center, it’s cheap and its consistently busy unlike most places.

Deja Vu

It’s a little far away but this Lebanese owned nightclub in the best thing about Monrovia. People of all shades and stripes flock to this place on the weekend. It can get crazy. There are tons of single ladies willing to jump your bones. You won’t want to leave! Get there before mid night if you want to avoid paying $15 in. It doesn’t get busy until 2. This place rox!

Embassy is another nearby venue. It’s a little more rave-ish and a little less hip-hip (like Deja Vu) f that’s more your scene.

My Monrovia Experience

It’s hard not to talk about Monrovia without talking about sex. It’s a pretty boring city otherwise. We originally stayed in a seedy brothel but couldn’t hack it and moved into a 4 star hotel. We also bought a pet chicken to join our Mexican Pirate crew. His name was Captain ‘Francais’ Cluck. It was all kind of nuts.

Our first night sieging Monrovia we went to Deja Vu. I never refused so much sex in my life. Women were fighting over us. I even refused two threesomes (no shit). The reason? They didn’t have their own place. In the end I choose to go home with a sexy chick with crazy white/green/red/blue hair who had a house. The next day, a different girl called to my hotel. She was dressed as if she was starring in a porno with a cracking body and massive DDs popping out of her dress. She told me she saw me at the club and found out where I live. She told me she wanted to fuck me the night before but there was too much girls trying to talk to me. Within 10 minutes of meeting her we were in a private room. I couldn’t get her lips off my dick. After screwing her brains out she even offered to give me a massage. Class!

As for Gary the fish, he went to bed early that night in Deja Vu (got too pissed). Turned out two girls knocked on our door at 4am and offered him a threesome (for free). He said no. Probably wise considering they could have robbed him/ demanded money anyway or stabbed his drunk ass. I can’t say I would have been so sensible.

That was only the first 24 hours…

Why not check out more cheeky City Guides?