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City Guide: Kingston, Jamaica

kingston-jamaica

Kingston in a word: Tough.

Chance of Hooking up: 2.5 / 5
Quality of Girls: 2.75 / 5
Nightlife: 4 / 5
Smoking tolerance: 4.5 / 5
Livability: 2.5/5

City guide ratings explained

Costs €$£

Bachelor’s budget: $90 per day.

Beer: $3 for a beer.
Bed: $25 for a private room (restricted guests). $50 for an apartment.
Bud: $1 should get you a couple of grams.
Food: $5 for a portion of Jerk Chicken.

Currency Conversion

Overview

Kingston was my favourite place in Jamaica. You don’t get hassled as much as the coast, you can find hot girls, and the nightlife is exceptional. That said, people aren’t very warm, logistics are a nightmare, and some parts of the city are pretty rough.

The Girls

elease-donovan-bad-girls-club1Appearance: As I mentioned before in my Jamaican Coast Guide, Jamaican girls, in general, are disappointing compared to their counterparts across the water in Africa. Fat is considered sexy for many Jamaican men, so expect to see many “fluffy” heifers about. Despite that, after going to the right night spots in Kingston, you can really find some gems. Some of the upper classes and mixed raced locals are smoking hot. They are not in abundance, but they exist.  The average female height 1.608 m (5 ft 3 12 in), although a lot of the good looking stock tend to b emuch taller.

Demographics: The vast majority of the population of Kingston is of African descent, mostly descended from the Akans (think Ghana) and the Igbo (warrior Nigerian tribe) in West Africa. Large minority ethnic groups include East Indians and Chinese. You also see a lot of Japanese and European tourists about.

Attitudes: Jamaican girls are not as friendly as others in the Caribbean. Ghetto chicks see you as walking dollar sign, but you’ll find  genuine friendliness from the middle and upper classes. Girls in this group are surprisingly approachable.

Gaming Strategy: Patwa is the de facto language on the street, but everybody speaks English. Night game and pipelining are your best chance at meeting a top quality girl. Guys here are direct, so a more subtle approach serves well. As a foreigner, you’re a little more exotic than on the coast, but it doesn’t offer any significant advantage. You can get numbers are attraction easy enough, but your biggest problem are logistics. Few accommodation allow guests. Unless you shell out for an apartment, you’re going to struggle. The only alternative is a “fuckshop”, a short-term love hotel primarily for prostitution. But don’t expect any girl worth her salt to jump at the idea.

The Dirt

Accommodation: The area you want to stay in is uptown Kingston. It’s safe and has nightlife. For apartments check out AirBnb. Aside from that options are quite limited. Anywhere north or east of Half Way Tree station isn’t a bad option. If you’re traveling solo or on a budget, I highly recommend you stay in Reggae Hostel. You can’t bring girls back, but the owner and staff are great, as is the location. It has a bar, cool people, and they even arrange nights out.

Getting High: You’re in Jamaica. Do you really need to ask me this? Don’t overpay. $10 should get you more than you could smoke. For more information, check out this webehigh article.

The Nightlife

Kingston nightlife is dynamic, adsorbing, and constantly evolving. The live music scene is also kickin’. However, it’s spread out. Don’t leave town without checking out a sound system /street party. Shit gets crazy. It the no.1 thing I recommend you do in Jamaica. Aside from that, where to go depends on the night. Random parties spring up in random places. Ask around. I can only speak from my experience. Kingston is a weekend town, but you can party 7 nights a week.

Weekend: The Quad is old news, but still worth a look. Asylum and Privilege are the new hot spots for clubbing, the former being the no.1 pick.

Sunday nights: Take a taxi high into the mountains and experience Dub Club. It’s essentially a massive house party with a sound system and a bar in somebody’s kitchen. The view is amazing. There are some nice middle class chicks around and the mix is good. Go early. By the 2AM it’s dead.

jamaicamusic.jpeg.size.xxlarge.letterboxHot Tuesdays: is a biggest street party in town Tuesday night. It’s a nice part of town, so unlike other street parties, there is a $10 cover. This is good because it keeps out the rift-raff.

Wednesday, check out Weddy Weddy Wednesdays in Uptown Kingston and Passa Passa (the largest street party in the city).

I also you recommend find out if there are any college parties are going on. UTECH in Pepine do student nights with cheap drink and are buzzing with middle/upper class girls. When I visited there were people handing out flyers.

My Kingston Experience

Although the city and it’s people didn’t exactly charm me, the diversity of Kingston’s nightlife certainly did. I spent five days there, but I would have liked to stay in the city longer to experience all it has to offer. I found it easier to pick up genuine girls here then other parts of the country, but it wasn’t easy. I got my Jai flag in Mo Bay, but in the capital my logistics made things almost impossible. Would I go back? Perhaps, but I wouldn’t be in a rush. The coolest thing I did in Kingston was go to house party of one of Bob Marley’s former guitarist. He gave me some strong shit. Respect, mon!

Experience of Others

Chantel, a cute 20-year-old student, had this to say…

Your typical Jamaican girl is very jealous, miserable, fashionable, and they like men with money. They likes to fight and are always smiling. Advice: If she’s genuine you’ll know based on how she talks to you. Most Jamaican girls like foreign men and they get craving after a time, so if u meet a girl here and she doesn’t crave for what you have then you can continue date her, but if u see that she wants to bring her friends to meet ups and always asking for things, avoid her. As for dating, men here don’t really take women on dates like foreigners. It’s more casual. You just show up at the same place or go to a park or something.

Other Resources

Why not check out more cheeky City Guides?

For more info on Jamaica, or if you have any questions, check out the links below or leave a comment.

The Jamaica Thread  on the Forum

Jamaica: Gyals n Tings by Scotian

 

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9 Responses to City Guide: Kingston, Jamaica

  1. Matt Johnson November 30, 2013 at 4:30 am #

    This was an excellent write-up. I’m surprised you gave it a 2.5 in hooking up. I thought Jamaican girls would be easy considering they’re descendants from West Africa. I guess most girls down there are conservative. I don’t think its worth going to Jamaica in my book to chase poon. It will probably would be worth a trip for the culture and the weed. I’ll take Sierra Leone over Jamaica any day.

  2. Socialkenny November 30, 2013 at 2:37 pm #

    Surprised I never received this post in my e-mail. I was wondering when were you gonna put up the JA piece.

    Well, I’m originally from the islands so I’m accustomed to dealing with Jamaican chicks on a daily basis, especially since I’m in Antigua currently. I never been to Jamaica though.

    The girls are very materialistic and the most materialistic you’ll ever meet probably in the world.

    There’s lots of Chinese and blacks mixed race over there. Wonder if you seen any.

    • Shawn January 23, 2015 at 5:14 pm #

      I saw a lot of Chinese around Montego Bay, and a few in Kingston, but no mixed types. From what I saw they pretty much stay with their own. Most of them seem to be all about business and not very friendly, though there was this one cute Chinese girl that smiled a lot at me and was extra nice, but the black Jamaicans weren’t any more friendly in general. In my opinion the only reason to go to Jamaica if your after girls is if you already have a girl set up for when you arrive and you can stay at her place because hotels around there are not cheap, unless you want to stay very far from where you want to be, but even than it can still cost you more than you would expect to pay for a country like Jamaica.

      I would say westernized Middle Eastern girls are the most materialistic in the world, but Jamaicans have to be close along with Vietnamese, but that’s my experience. 😛

      If you fly to Kingston which is generally the most economical city to fly to, you’ll pay a significant taxi fee just getting to your first destination since the airport is located far away from the livable part of the city since it’s on a long man-made peninsula. It’s also difficult to get to places west of Kingston like May Penn, Black River, or Mandeville because the nice buses don’t run that way. You have to do transfers with more common buses (dangerous) or fork out a lot of due for a taxi. I don’t know because I haven’t been to any of those place just Kingston and along the north coast, but I would be willing to bet girls are a bit nicer in those areas since there are few tourist there. Sounds good on paper, but I may never find out since I certainly don’t plan on going back there, way too many negatives.

  3. anonymous December 31, 2013 at 2:56 am #

    did you try staying at the Pegasus hotel, Wyndham, Four seasons, Courtleigh hotel or Knutsford court. these are the best hotels in kingston

    • Shawn January 28, 2015 at 6:26 am #

      I don’t doubt you for a second about how nice the hotels are, but that wasn’t my issue, you can always find nice hotels, I just want something decent for little money. In my experience Americans in general give far too much priority to how great of a hotel they get. Hay, if that’s what floats your boat go right ahead, but for me, all I need is a clean, safe room to myself with my own private bathroom and a decent bed, and I’m happy. After all, I didn’t make trips to countries to stay in a hotel. A hotel room is mainly for three things, sleeping, clean up, and bringing women back. I’ve gotten nice roomy, clean, safe, and sometimes pretty modern hotel rooms for $15 or less in places like Philippines, Peru, Mexico, and not always in small towns, but in the middle of very decent areas in Lima and Cebu. Mexico varies dramantically depending on where you are. Ecuador can also be good for hotels, at lest it was 6 years ago. Guatemala and El Salvador are okay, but what pisses me off about those countries, especially El Salvador is they always want to charge you for a guest, and charge you almost double.

      If I have to pay more than $25 a night I’m pissed, and that rarely every happens because I’m good at finding deals. Some of the best places you wont’ find on the internet, you have to go look by foot or ask around, and you can usually find a gem pretty quickly. In Jamaica though, you’re generally better off finding a rental. If I was trying to impress a girl with my hotel room that would be a different thing, but that’s never been my strategy. I would much, much rather spend 10 days in a economical hotel than only spend 3 or 4 days in an expensive one. To me, time is far more important than luxury.

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