One More Beer: My first (epic) night in the Dominican Republic

OK. It’s just past midday and I’m still in fucking bits from last night, so do forgive any mispelling or incoherence. My first night in DR went a little somthing like this…

10PM: FUCK LONELY PLANET. I hit the town solo in Zona Colonia, the main area of the captial city, Santo Domingo. Like a twat I try out a few bars from the so called “traveler’s bible”. Call me a heretic, but they really don’t have a clue. The guys who write up those guides are obviously sterile and probably spend most of their time gettin’ info online, in between looking at porn on their dorm bed. Anyway, Zona wasn’t up to much for a Thursday, so I bounced.

1AM: FUCK LONG PANTS. Following a solid tip left by one of the guys on Roosh’s forum, I took a long walk to Venezuela Street. The street had a few decent looking places, all packed with just locals. It looked promising, but I got refused entry to every single bar  because I was in a t-shirt, shorts and runners. Bad buzz…

2AM: FUCK MY LIFE. You should have seen me. Depressed. Alone. Gazing at a flat beer at some shitty roadside burger joint. I dwell on the empty nature of a swagabond’s life. Here lies the Naughty Nomad… what a fuckin’ tit. Rather than bear the lonely 40 mintue walk back to my hostel, I just get in a taxi and retire.

3AM: FUCK SLEEP. I decide to grab one more beer. Maybe, just maybe, there would be somewhere close by that was open a few heads knockin’ about.

3.30AM: FUCK PENSIONERS. The only place I could find with people was a cramped little karaoke joint full of geriatrics. After a few drinks enduring old couples slow dancing to discordal trife, I make polite conversation with two women in their 40’s. One of them is moderately attractive and is the proprietor of an afterhour’s bar. She gives me her card. The name of bar is Cafe de Toi.

3.45: FUCK DOMINICAN DRUG DEALERS. On a trip to the ATM, I meet a local guy who hooks me up with a little ganja. He seems alright, so I invite him for a beer. We go to the Cafe de Toi and the guy turns out to be a leech who keeps asking for money for his family. Gone. I stay drinking with this entertaining gay guy from San Fran.

4.30AM: FUCK, I’M DRUNK. By this stage the owner of the bar has arrived and is throwing free shots and beers into me like there’s no tomorrow. I’m having fun, feeling rather gregarious and peacocking with a white bandana. The bar is pretty much empty but I get talking to the only single girl in the place. Lucky for me, she’s hot. She is a tall latina, with great tits and a whopper ass. Her name is Alma, she’s only 19. It just so happens, she’s also Miss Dominican Republic for Miss American Continent!!! You can see some pics of her here and here. I do the cube on her. Her response: “I’m going to rape you.” She was serious…

5.00AM: FUCK. She drives us back to my place, we wonder up to an empty room in the hostel and close the door behind us. I’ll leave the rest up to your filthy imaginations. Things got ultraviolent. Needless to say, it was fucking awesome.

RIGHT NOW: WTF? Man, I’m feeling good. First night, flag captured in style. I’ve even sobered up while writing this post too! Fantastic.. now I got to find somewhere to stay tonight… the journey carries on.

What have we learned? You never know wher one more beer might lead you…

….

BTW- If you want proof this actually happened, click here.

 

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29 Responses to One More Beer: My first (epic) night in the Dominican Republic

  1. Jesse Charger January 28, 2011 at 8:00 pm #

    Wow, great report. That caliber of girl alone at the bar at 4:30am? Wow… I’m looking forward to reading how you would compare the Latina girls in the Caribbean and Central Americas to the girls in Riga and the Ukraine of whom you rated very highly… have fun!!!

    • Naughty Nomad January 30, 2011 at 2:51 pm #

      It doesn’t top EE in terms of general standar, but you got great T and A here. DAM! And when they’re hot, they’re very hot.

  2. Simon January 28, 2011 at 8:31 pm #

    Well done old boy! Am totally proud of you! The pics of the Latina are very hot! Really not bad game for 4:30 on a Thursday night!

  3. Hamster January 28, 2011 at 9:40 pm #

    99% chance she’s a semi pro and that place is a hooker (or hooker friendly) bar. Don’t forget that zona colonial is where mostly gold hunters and gringos come. Single girls never go out alone in DR. They go out in couples or with friends (mixed). 2 girls together = Most likely putas. In Calle Venezuela normal girls from below middle class go and it’s super easy to pick up. Beware of spiked drinks anywhere in DR! Watch your drinks carefully, also when the bartender prepare them. Stay out of Zona Colonial and get used to leeches, even normal girls are leeches. Expect to pay propinas for her family and provide her with call credits if you want to stay in with her. Perfectly normal even for local guys to get leeched. Read the dr1.com forum. It’s a very complex country so be aware.

    • Naughty Nomad January 30, 2011 at 2:50 pm #

      That chick is a model, so she’s no pro.
      Last night I hit Venezuela and that was a different story. Picked up no problem… she was defo on the game but I shored her.

  4. John January 28, 2011 at 11:02 pm #

    You sure that “Miss DR” wasn’t really the 40 year old proprietor you chatted up earlier?

    “By this stage the owner of the bar has arriving, and is throwing free shots and beers into me like there’s no tomorrow.” Yep, there we gotcha. It was her. ;)

    What the locals told me: “He who drinks Brugal at night either ends up fucking or fighting.” Tasty stuff, both the rum and the beer. And the cigars. And the women.

    Enjoy Santo but get elsewhere pronto. The DR has so much more to offer.

    • Naughty Nomad January 30, 2011 at 2:47 pm #

      That story is 100% legit amigo. I took that beauty queen down.

  5. Lumiere January 29, 2011 at 1:57 am #

    I love the ‘just one more beer’ SNLs. I have a very similar story from BA with an Argie chick who wanted me to slap her around while I was banging her.

  6. Atlas Al January 29, 2011 at 11:11 am #

    What’s your total flag count at now? Since the DR has been captured, which two are on your flag radar?

    • Naughty Nomad January 30, 2011 at 2:44 pm #

      Hmm.. Haiti anyway, and any other carribean country… my flag count is 31.

  7. Latin Stylez January 30, 2011 at 3:42 pm #

    Wow, seems like a fun wild night out… Glad to hear you captured your first Dominican flag. That also sucks about the Lonely Planet guide. You are right a majority of the venues they put on there are pretty lame!!

  8. John January 30, 2011 at 5:43 pm #

    Well if it really happened then you had a ton of luck running into such a dime at that place and that time of the night. It speaks for your skill that you took her down so easily. Congratulations then! Keep the reports coming…

    • Naughty Nomad January 31, 2011 at 3:53 pm #

      The funny thing is, it didn’t take much skill. She was actually quite predatory. The luck of the Irish ;)

  9. Bugs Bunny February 1, 2011 at 8:44 pm #

    Haha bless that one more beer, she’s smoking hot man. By the way I’m waiting for the New Yorker to comment on the post haha.

  10. La Verdad February 7, 2011 at 5:54 am #

    Bullshit.

    • Naughty Nomad February 7, 2011 at 7:41 pm #

      100% fact.

  11. Naughty Nomad February 14, 2011 at 12:46 pm #

    If anyone wants proof, email me.

  12. eric December 30, 2011 at 5:23 am #

    u need to see this site at ifoundthechicas dot com

  13. Tusk November 3, 2012 at 9:15 pm #

    Yo Nomad
    I’ll be arriving to SDQ at 10:30 and staying at Hotel Mercure. I will be solo, where do you reccomend I go first to meet some chicas?

    • Naughty Nomad November 4, 2012 at 8:26 am #

      Mucumbas on Venezuela Street.

  14. AFI January 20, 2013 at 10:34 am #

    Have you every heard of Calabar and the women there?? You should definitely check this out bro
    http://bit.ly/RP06F7

  15. Rico May 19, 2013 at 6:31 pm #

    Love the info!! You’re the man!
    I’m looking to go this summer and want to find the exotic fine sexy beautiful light skin women. Is the country side the best place to find a wifey or better off going to the universities?

  16. Socialkenny the pickup artist June 29, 2013 at 2:43 am #

    Good game on that chick Naughty. I mean, it gets no better than that with actually pulling a pageant queen type of chick.

    An old post but still kicks ass!

  17. maximus February 7, 2014 at 5:24 pm #

    I doubt that girl you banged was Miss DR. There’s no way a pageant winner would be in a bar at 4 am, alone. Probably some girl that looked like her.

    • Naughty Nomad February 7, 2014 at 11:19 pm #

      I have proof. See link in post.

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