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Why Number Closing is outdated

The game has changed.

Old School

Gone are the days where you ask for her number, or her for yours.

We can lay waste to the feelings of doubt and disconcerting angst, that often plagues the mind after you obtain those hopeful digits, reliable or otherwise.

That shits over. Number closing is outdated.

On my last birthday in September, a young Cameroonian woman  of 18 approached me. Fair play to her, it appears the fruits of female empowerment in a post-feminist society have ripened. But that’s not what grabbed my attention. It was her opener.

“Hey, can I have your facebook?”

Boom! Simple and effective. The more I thought about, the more I released – my word it’s genius. Face-close! (you heard it here first)

Let’s look at the incredible advantages of a Face-close.

  1. Screening
    Let’s face it, people are shallow. Now we can perv on potential lovers via their profile pics! Sure she looked good that night when you put the brewery out of business, but have you seen her holiday album? She’s a whale, that’s not a g-string that’s a z-string! “Remove as friend.”
  2. It facilitates DHV’s (demonstrations of higher value)
    What about that pic of you jumping out a plane, or wrestling a crocodile? Oh yes, women can’t help be impressed when they scroll down to find out you have a masters in Superology and speak Swahili. Your profile does all the work for you!
  3. You can IM
    I ask you, is calling a girl you just met a good idea? Most younger chicks find it way too direct, forget what any book tells you. Unless you’re exceptional at thinking on your feet it’s best avoided. Then there’s texting. One can simply ignore you. I abhor those time lags too; it might as well be Morse code! Sure you have time to think about your responses, but then you got the misinterpretations and those long drawn out conversations that sometimes take over 24 hours to complete. Instant messaging provides a great medium; your language is considered, yet it’s still live communication. Facebook provides yet again. Even normal messages are better than txting or phoning.
  4. It builds comfort and trust
    She’s know all about you – she’s seen your pics, your friends, your interests & knows where you went to school and what you do for a living. You’ve chatted, LOLed and even “liked” the fact her cat Mitsy was diagnosed with Diabetes. All this, and you haven’t even met. By the time you do, you’ll bed her faster than an Ikea salesman.

Now, let me share some advice. Here are two simple steps I’d recommend to ensure your profile works for you and not against you.

  • Make lists. I put all women on my “chicas” list. I even divide girls into regions. I might want to talk my “Eastern Europe” girls tonight and ignore “Asia”. Furthermore, you can exclude such groups from seeing certain status updates and photo albums. Lists are great!
  • Privacy & Pics. Don’t let girls see photos your tagged in. Like the one of you vomiting in a fish tank… Potential bedmates should only see what you want them to see, to paint you in the best possible light.

See what I mean?


So there you go. Next time you want to number close, think again.



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18 Responses to Why Number Closing is outdated

  1. omegaman93555 December 3, 2010 at 6:21 pm #

    Seeing other hot girls you are friends with can’t hurt- unless you have a girlfriend, she isn’t going to like seeing other hot girls you are friends with. But I guess this applies to guys who aren’t really interested in having a girlfriend.

    • naughtynomad December 3, 2010 at 6:40 pm #

      Very true, but you can also make privacy setting so she don’t see your hot friends 😉

  2. Jesse Charger December 3, 2010 at 7:17 pm #

    Some good points there! I need to utilize Facebook more

  3. The Rookie December 3, 2010 at 9:47 pm #

    i’ve been lazy about maintaining my page and keeping it fresh. the list thing is a great idea. i agree that getting numbers is outdated, but right now i think my page would demonstrate lower value…

  4. FretDancer December 4, 2010 at 5:48 pm #

    Good post nomad. But do you plan on completely stopping number-closing and changing to face-closing? I feel like I don’t want to “move on” to face-closing even when I do use facebook often.

    Also I think facebook removes the “mystery” vibe that some men seek to emanate and some women crave. What are your thoughts on this?

    • admin December 4, 2010 at 6:04 pm #

      Good Point.. No doubt getting the number has it’s place. Sometimes Face-closing is not convenient. It’s so much quicker just to key in a number on your phone.. it depends on the situation I guess.

  5. Vincent Ignatius December 5, 2010 at 5:35 pm #

    Facebook needs a way to hide two people from each other. I’m afraid that I’m going to take out a random girl, and then while I’m sleeping, she’s going to write “I had a great time” on my wall and my #1 who stalks my wall is going to see it.

    • gj May 13, 2014 at 2:57 am #

      It is called “Logging Out”….definitely essential if you are facebooking in the presence of someone else, especially a short-time girl!

  6. raliv December 20, 2010 at 8:52 pm #

    This is very good if you are already living a lifestyle that DHVs. While I have significant pictures of me and my exes and with hot girls, it can scream try hard if you do too much.

    I would like to travel around the country and collect cool pictures of me doing awesome shit.

  7. Brian March 3, 2011 at 1:09 pm #

    How do you make your Friend’s pictures private so they can’t see other girls? What countries do you see this working the best? I am assuming this is more for Pipelining than meeting in person. I not sure what is good to show. Show that you’ve traveled all around the world and they see you as someone who’ll will be a one night stand. You don’t want to show any girl you’ve been with to any other? Show real good looking friends? Do you want your family on there too?

  8. fogal February 12, 2013 at 8:42 am #
    this article says go for the number and avoid facebook otherwise u could be just friendzone

    • Naughty Nomad February 12, 2013 at 3:46 pm #

      I disagree. You just need to have your profile working for you. Any chick who checks out mine tends to get closer to the fuckzone rather than the friendzone.


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