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City Guide: Yerevan, Armenia

Opera House from Cascade

Yerevan in a word: Passable.

Chance of Hooking up: 1.75 / 5
Quality of Girls: 3.75 / 5
Nightlife: 2 / 5
Smoking tolerance: 2 / 5

City guide ratings explained

Costs €$£

Bachelor’s budget: $50 per day

Beer: $1.70 a pint.
Bed: $30 per night for an apartment.
Bud: $30 for a matchbox.
Food: $2-3 for a meal.

Currency Conversion

Overview 

Yerevan is no match for the grandeur of its rivals Tbilisi and Baku, but it still has its charms. A walk around Opera Square and a trek up Cascade and Freedom Park in the evening will leave you with a favorable impression of the city—which still outclasses most ex-soviet capitals. Regardless, the main appeal of the city is its laid back vibe. It was the only city in the Caucasus where I’d consider living for a month or two.

The Girls

armenian001Appearance: I expected Armenians to be quite homogeneous in looks, but nothing could be further from the truth. The Armenian tribe is similar to the Jewish tribe… they got displaced, became diverse and diluted, and their diaspora kinda came from everywhere once the state was formed. As such, the standard deviation in attractiveness is greater than anywhere in the Caucasus. I saw more world classes stunners here, but I also saw more fatties. It was the only country I saw American-style obese women and Slavic model-types walking down the same street. That said, there are still some common features. Similar to Azeris, the vast majority of the population have black hair (around 75&, often curly), dark eyes and prominent angular noses. Bizarrely, there are also some natural blonde hair/blue eyed Armenians, too. Their average height is 158cm (5 ft 2 in). That stat is kinda deceptive, however, as they have the tallest girls and guys we saw in the region (back to the deviation I was talking about).

If you go to the right spots, you will see some of the sexiest girls you’ve seen in your life. Armenians dress more feminine than Georgians, but less so than Azeris. Girls are quite image conscience and take care of their appearance. A top drawer Armenian in the cream of the region.

Demographics: 98% percent of Yerevan are described as ethnic Armenia, while a few thousand Russian, Iranian and other groups account for the rest .

Attitudes: Armenia is the oldest Christian country in the world and people are still very traditional (by European standards, at least). Indubitably, Armenian girls are the most conservative of all Caucasian Christians and are much more sexually reserved than any of their eastern European counterparts. The average age to get married in 24 and it is estimated somewhere between 60% to 80% of Armenian girls are still virgins when they marry. Interestingly, I had more naked Armenians in my bed than any other nationality in the region, but going from foreplay to intercourse was like scaling Mount Ararat. It’s like Armenian chicks have electric buzzers in their vaginas that go off every time they sense a snake in their mists.  A lot of investment is required to nail them down. If you do, prepare for a lot of attention.  The good news is Armenians are very affectionate, feminine and the perfect blend of sexy versus romantic. I’m not the marrying kind, but if I was, an Armenian woman would be top of my list.

Eva rivas

Gaming Strategy: The prime day location to pick up is around Opera square, where many girls hang out on the benches or swam lake. Unlike its counterparts Baku and Tbilisi, nightlife here is actually a good (if not the best) option to meet single ‘liberal’ girls. Unlike Azeris, many Armenian girls drink in bars. You’ll still need to work though. That means a few meet-ups (with you paying the bill) and a lot of comfort building. Yerevan is also one of the worst capital cities I’ve been to for ‘big village’ syndrome. For example: On a walk to the park with one of my dates, she got stopped three times by people she knew. The next day I even had a previous girl I dated bump into us. It was terrible awkward and really fucked shit up. So the lesson here is be discreet. Scope out a quite bar near your apartment and minimise time in public. The good news is that English is more prevalent here than Georgia and Azerbaijan! It was a welcome relief from spitting my bad Russian.

The Dirt

Hot Zone

AccommodationI’ll keep it simple: stay somewhere near Opera Square, preferably between there and Pushkin Street (a good bar street). We stayed at a great place off Pushkin for $35 a night, right by our favourite bar. Look no further than this site: Yerevan Apartments.

Getting High: Where to buy marijuana in Tbilisi: Ask the staff at Process basement bar of Moscow Street. Alternatively ask here.

Yerevan marijuana prices: Prices can vary greatly. Usually about $30 for a for a matchbox, but costs vary from around $20 – $40 max.

The Nightlife 

The nightlife scene in Yerevan was my favourite in the Caucasus – but that’s not saying much. You have a good variety of cool bars with decent music and a party atmosphere. Plus, pretty much everywhere is within walking distance. Here are my top picks.

Hemmingway Bar

Very cliquey, small and quiet, but a good place to bring a date and an easy place to make friends. (Not a place to party by any means.)

Calumet

Calumet

Calumet

This little basement ethnic bar was probably my favourite bar in the whole region (provided it doesn’t get too packed). Good vibes, Asian decor, GREAT music (often live bands), laid back crowd, cheap beer, cool staff and lot’s a girls dancing. I had a blast here and kissed a few chicas, too. The quality isn’t always that high though. Pics and videos here. Sadly, this place is becoming a victim of it’s own success and get a little packed.

Bourbon Street

This bar may well have the highest standard of chicks for in any one place for a thousand miles. DAM! This reason for this? If you want to get in you’ll need a member’s card. To get a member’s card, you need to fill in an application form with photo attached. If you’re not hot or in the know, you’re not getting in. Luckily, as a foreigner you can blag your way in. We were luckily as we got on the guest list through a friend. Great bar, not too pretentious either, despite it’s exclusively. Dress sharp. Facebook here.

My Yerevan Experience

I really liked the city. When I hunting for the mother of my child later in life, I may well mine here. As for my experience with the girls, I actually went to bed with three girls in four days there, but I still don’t have a flag to show for it. I got half a dick in two of them momentarily (both virgins), but I’m not counting it. My only consolation is both girls gave me their first blow jobs (or so they say). One of them became a stalker and camped outside my room for hours on end, the other nearly moved to Ireland so we could be together, so I obviously made an impression. Oh, and funny enough, the third girl and I are actually meeting up next month in Ethiopia of all places. (She lives there and technically and Ethiopian flag though…I think). Random, eh? I love Armenian girls. Totally my type… dark, sexy and innocent.

EDIT: I recently made love to a sweet Armenian virgin.

Experience of Others

Unfortunately, I don’t have refs from any male expats in the city, so I asked some Armenian girlfriends to share their thoughts.

Koh, 20, who spent a semester in the States gives her perspective.

Armenian girls being courted before actually going out on a date is an important thing. When it comes to dating, girls here choose the guy they date very carefully. Most of the times they won’t choose a guy they’re not serious about.

Pre-marital sex is a taboo. It’s socially condemned and even talking about it is not really acceptable.

Marriage and family are very important things for Armenian girls, we take it very seriously. While getting an education and earning your own living are important, family will always take first place. Armenian wives are typical house keepers. The divorce rate here is very low, and being divorced is also socially frowned upon.

I’d say 80-90% of my female friends strongly agree with the idea of no sex before marriage.

You can meet nice girls pretty much anywhere. Girls here are very friendly towards visitors, so if you politely approach someone they’ll most likely respond positively. Don’t be cheap. If you like the girl, then no matter what she says and how much she resists, always insist on paying for the bill and escorting her home [Zolo’s Comment: Don’t the mind the escort, but do offer to pay for drinks like other FSU countries].

Ri, 26, a blonde Armenian, said this.

Armenia is between the Eastern and Western mentality,  but with a bit more focus on the Western thinking and approaches than those of the oriental world. Things are changing. Currently, pre-marital sex is not such a rare thing for those who love each other and want to take up another step [barf], but virginity is still very common in Armenia before marriage.

Armenian girls are quite different from other European girls you might have met in a way, because apart from being quite hot:), we’re also quite caring wives and mums. I know many local girls marrying foreigners, but to get the trust of an Armenian girl is the hardest thing.

Other testimonials from pretty much every guy I talked to who has been there:

It’s fucking hard to hook up.

Other Resources

Why not check out more cheeky City Guides?

For more info or if you have any questions on Yerevan…

Armenia Discussion Thread

Armenian Brides: What you need to know.

Armenian girls by Claritalux.

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28 Responses to City Guide: Yerevan, Armenia

  1. Tim January 11, 2013 at 12:53 am #

    Other than the “fucking hard to hook up” it sounds marvelous.

    • Philip Rhayader October 13, 2013 at 2:47 pm #

      Dude, you were looking for a hookup in all the wrong places 😀

    • Eken August 14, 2019 at 2:17 am #

      Oh

  2. rocko January 13, 2013 at 7:07 am #

    dark sexy and innocent…..o ya we know you have a fetish for dark features lol..hence the ratings
    armenian girls are known to be very ggod lookin in the middle east….some of irans beauty queens were of armenian descent.
    think kim kardshaian is part armeanian….good example of aremenian sexyness in the region

  3. Bella October 13, 2013 at 8:22 pm #

    This is awesome :DDDDD
    I’m a girl and I’m from Armenia.
    What you have wrote is 95% truth :DDDD

    • MOSEN March 20, 2014 at 10:37 am #

      I LOVE YOU.I WANT BY YOU FRENDLY

    • J April 8, 2014 at 9:22 am #

      Hi I would like to visit Armenia is it safe

      • Naughty Nomad April 9, 2014 at 9:03 pm #

        No… it’s haunted :/

    • raj July 2, 2014 at 11:37 am #

      Hi i want you and pls…contact me

    • hami March 22, 2016 at 3:40 pm #

      hi i’ii come to yerevan 25th march 2016.do you like spend 3 day with me

    • phoenix July 24, 2016 at 8:01 am #

      bella….i am phoenix….next month i planning to go Armenia…my vacation…if going alone any problems

      please help me

  4. Dev March 4, 2014 at 3:21 am #

    coming to yerevan wanna to know more about night out clubs

  5. Sahil April 27, 2014 at 10:46 am #

    I am visiting Yerevan in June. Any night clubs that are a MUST go where we can find sexy girls who like to hook up? Based on your blog, one night stands in Yerevan seems highly unlikely. Any other sex shops or bars to enjoy a week there? Please suggest also any issue’s one might face with safety and law? Thank you.

    • Naughty Nomad May 2, 2014 at 7:39 pm #

      Read the post.

  6. Yan May 16, 2014 at 12:10 pm #

    I can confirm that it is EXTREMELY difficult to get laid in Armenia.
    I spent two weeks there (for professional reasons) and I can assure you guys that as a non-Armenian man (but pretty good-looking), I had no chance to date any girl.
    Even if you’re Armenian from the diaspora, you’ll have to be very patient, it would take a lot of time.
    I know a very few expats in Yerevan, none of them has ever had sex with a local girl.
    Concerning the rate of the girls who want to be virgin before marriage, I guess it is closer to 90% than 60%.
    Armenia is a very conservative country, many things have been said here, it is true that you’ll see many beautiful girls walking with their moms, and the “village syndrome” is so true, they all know each other.
    Some Armenian men are going to Russia to find a job and some of them marry Russian girls. But it not the case with Armenian women, as I understood, almost all of them marry Armenian men.
    As a conclusion, I would say : don’t go to Armenia for having sex with girls. Even though they are very attractive, you won’t be able to conclude anything, except with the ugly fatty prostitutes you can find at night in some districts (some of them are Russian).
    I read a comment somewhere else, someone was saying that looking at would be the only thing you’ll be ever able to do.

  7. Jose November 21, 2014 at 2:45 am #

    No body will like dirt tourist go to sanfrancisco ca if some body will looking for girls to hook up in Armenia local man can beat you up and when police will come they can tell this fucking tourist come here to have sex police will deport you and you will pay find so jots don’t be so extremely to find bitch if you like how armenian girls look just go Mexica it a lot cheaper like Laredo or Tijuana 20 $ sexy girls 16-and up

  8. George January 29, 2015 at 6:20 pm #

    i dont understand u guys)
    getting laid in yerevan was easy! i was there 1 week and i got 2 girls, i met both online (okcupid)
    you just need to know some Russian
    Armenian girls are into foreigners, but most of them prefer serious relationship – marriage rather than 1 night stands

  9. Fwendi Yondo October 6, 2015 at 1:39 pm #

    hey how do you think a brother by that I mean a black dude would fend for himself out the in places like Albania, Moldova etc when it comes to trying to get laid.

    • Mark Zolo October 7, 2015 at 11:56 am #

      I can’t say tbh.

    • EZ91 November 19, 2015 at 5:34 am #

      @Fwendi Yondo, you’ll be fine. I’ve hooked with a few Armenians girls here in America. There’s quite a few that do have a thing for brothers, but it’s very low key….

  10. Mark September 12, 2017 at 8:39 pm #

    i was in yerevan once and one of my local friends …. give me this guy contact , his sellin a good Mj for verry good price

    you can find him on Telegram – @tbt2020

    have a good trip… the city is really awesome

  11. Michael September 24, 2017 at 5:56 am #

    Hey Mark, is he still providing? I’m from the States and have my medical marijuana card (which isn’t valid in Armenia), however, for the sake of my medical condition, I must have some. =P

    • Angela Dileep Kumar February 8, 2019 at 7:44 pm #

      so did u get any medicines ? i am travelling there soon and want to know my chances

  12. Nagraj July 4, 2018 at 6:49 pm #

    hey…. can anyone let me know whether DoubleTree by Hilton in Yerevan is girl friendly or not?

    Also…. which hotels are girl friendly?

  13. Mark January 11, 2019 at 6:18 am #

    Thank you very much for this article. Could you provide some more details on a couple of things? 1. Did one of the girls really stand outside your room for several hours? How did you handle that situation? 2. When you say you got “half a dick” inside two of the girls, do you mean you literally got it half way inside and then they stopped you or do you mean something else? Could you explain this? Thanks!

    • Mark Zolo January 25, 2019 at 10:48 am #

      1. Yes. I handled it by eating her food and being a gentleman.
      2. Lol. I met that quite literally. I later met up with one of them in Italy and we went the full distance.

  14. xtc June 27, 2019 at 11:55 pm #

    i’m an armenian girl and fucking despise the “no sex before marriage” bullshit. even when they do get married they have really quiet sex like 1.5 times a month until the girl gets pregnant then they never do it again ahahaha. and marriage is just a piece of paperwork that makes you lose yourself. soo in conclusion i’d be down to hook up 🙂

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  1. The Year in Review 2013 | Naughty Nomad - January 1, 2014

    […] to Italy, and tick San Marino off the list in the process. I also meet up with a girlfriend from Yerevan in Treviso, and claim a beautiful Armenian virgin as my […]

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