A provocative title serving as blatant sensationalism? No. This might be the most controversial post I’ve published to date.
I’ll put my hands up, I raped a kid.
I thoroughly enjoyed the experience, as did she.
Now before you grab your pitchforks and demand my balls on a plate, I want to state emphatically, that mere semantics betray context. By rape I refer to that of the statuary variety, according to laws of my country. And by kid, I’m talking about a smoking hot model of 16. Interestingly, her father is affiliated with the Triads and traffics women to Europe, but that is neither here nor there.
With that introduction, this article asks the question:
How young is too young?
We’ve all had this debate, but let’s analyse the different ’rules’ us guys concoct to determine ‘how low can you go’. I will start from the more conservative end of the spectrum.
The “Half your age plus seven” rule
Gaining ground in recent years, many men now subscribe to this rule. You half your current age, add seven years, then round down if needs be. Voilà! That’s your limit. Thou shall not slay a nubile below this age.
A Pro-ageing formula
In theory it’s a great guideline, as the age gap may increase as you get older, but not by a margin that is considered unacceptable in society. A man of 40 can date a 27 year old without being labelled a cradle snatcher. Furthermore, a man of 65 may date a woman of 39, who let’s be honest, is past her sell-by date anyway. One problem – this is bullshit for younger guys! I always break this rule, hell I broke it last night banging an 18 year old (I’m 24). A guy of 30 can only date women 22 and over? What a load of crap! I feel entitled to bang and date teenagers well into my thirties thank you.
This rule should only apply to guys over 40 who are looking for life partners.
The “If she’s old enough to be in the club” rule
This rule just forwards all responsibility to the doorman. But in fairness, it has it’s place. If a chick thinks she’s mature enough to go out partying and get pissed off her face in the hormone swamp that is the local disco, she’s old enough to get pounded by an alpha dog.
But what about the younger girls who get refused at the door? In the States the drinking age is 21. This rule isn’t for me.
The “Legal Age of Consent” Rule
Let’s face it – rules are made to be broken. Now it gets interesting. If you are the kind of person that needs man-made laws to restrict your sexual behaviour, I have beef with you. Why? Because this rule is not based on principal, it’s just a number that changes relative to where you are. People who support this convention (albeit law) are just exhibiting behaviour brought on by conditioning in their respective society, and are subsequently incapable of independent internal discourse. My point about relativity is highlighted by the following map, which shows the legal age of consent in different countries around the world.
Everything is relative
This map shows massive disparity. If you are in California it’s 18, but if you take a drive down to Mexico it’s gets prepubescent. This rule is without consensus and ethically hallow. 20 in Tunisia!? Would you be down with that? Didn’t think so.
The “Nature knows” Rule
“If she’s old enough to bleed, she’s old enough to breed.” You think that’s bad… I’m not even finished yet! I’m not defending guys who go out and bang 12 year old girls the minute they get their period – that’s not cool. Unless her age ends with a -teen you probably deserve a prison sentence.
However, ask yourself the question: Why would nature indicate to us, the moment a female has reached reproductive capacity? It’s nature’s way of saying… let’s get it on. But many evolutionary biologists would argue that early menstruation is imperative for survival, while real adulthood isn’t achieved until much later, both physically and mentally. Nature may know, but evidently it has no standards. A friend of mine (37) banged a 15 year old when we were in Philly, I guy I work with (30) broke in a girl of 14 recently. Wrong? Maybe, but I didn’t loose respect for either of them. Why?
Angelina Jolie, aged 15
Kim Kardashian, aged 14
Model Li Yuan, aged 14
This chicks only 12!
See what I mean? WTF? I don’t about you, but when I look at these girls I can’t help but feel a little conflicted. Most modeling agencies recruit girls from 14, even 13. Women’s fashion sexualize younger girls and send us mixed messages. But it’s not all black and white, some women develop a lot faster than others. I’ve seen some 16 years that look too young and some 14 year olds I’d think twice about; it’s all relative. You can put all the rules you want in play, but at the end of the day, it’s instinct that dictates how young is too young. That said, we need to draw the line somewhere…
She's just begging for it.
The “Peado” Rule
“If she’s old enough to crawl, she’s in the right position.”
Sex with children is funny, but wrong. Anyone who harbours a sexual desire for pre-pubescent kids has a serious problem. Do us all a favour and castrate yourself. Alternatively, become a Catholic priest. I hear you score some premo bum if you’re in with the church.
So what’s “Naughty Nomad’s” Rule?
Personally, I don’t believe in absolutes. I lean towards “Natures Knows” but see myself migrating to the half your age plus seven idea when I’m older. To this day, 16 has been my lowest. Generally I find girls under 17 too immature. That said, if I met a young girl that looked like Kim when she was 14, I’d take her down in a second. A little naughty perhaps, but I’m the naughty nomad.
I’d love to her what you guys think.
Which rule do you follow?
I’ve already committed to even MORE travel since last week. I’m off snowboarding in France in a fortnight and the next week I’m in the Caribbean. In March I’ll be taking a little a dip in Slovakia & Czech Republic and then it’s off the West Africa for a few months. In theory my goal of 15 new countries will be completed by the summer! By the end of the year it could well be 20+ new countries after I visit the gulf around September. Provided I’m granted safe passage in Africa this one’s in the bag. Expect dozens of top-notch city guides spanning four continents.
2. Acquire conversational French
Most desired flags of 2011:
